Okay, so another song too much for my little soul. Goddamn it, I forgot what darkness has been in me since 6th grade. Thought it didn't show up till 8th grade. Jesus. I was an alto in choir and we'd show up for practice before school started. Sometimes it would still be dark out. I did like choir. Still have my little gold pin somewhere. Was it hormones that dented my mind? Dad left the military and came back home to stay. My eldest brother went off to college. Mom, my younger sister, and other brother still lived with us at home, so why do I remember being alone? That's when sad music possessed me. It was exquisite? The longing, so piercing. I get tears now just thinking of how the pining for that town in Oregon took my breath away. Gave me goosebumps. Not even my crushes could make me feel quite the same way. And that night camping with the Girl Scouts when, in my tent, I realized I wouldn't find anyone who would look at the stars the way I do. In the beautiful charcoal-navy sky.